Urine a Heap of Trouble, Young Lady! College Volleyball Star Arrested for DUI, Blows .260 % BAC, Then Tries to Urinate on Cops - Roberta Santos

Wait . . . she did what? Okay, here's the whole story: Roberta Santos, a setter for Florida Gulf Coast University, was pulled over by Naples, FL cops around 11:40 p.m. Wednesday as she was leaving campus. According to them, Santos crossed the center line in her white Chevy Cavalier seven times before officers stopped her, detected the odor of alcohol on her breath and administered field sobriety tests . . . which Santos failed miserably. And here's were it gets interesting: once she knew she was being arrested, Santos started begging the cops to let her go and screamed at them from the back of the patrol car. At the Lee County Sheriff’s Office Santos finally submitted to a breath test and blew an impressive .260 BAC, enough to break the Top Twenty of the BadJocks BAC Rankings. Then, according to police, the junior volleyball star "became very agitated about not being permitted to use the phone" and allegedly decided to get back at the officer by arching her back and trying to urinate on him. Instead, she ended up soaking both herself and the floor with urine. According to reports, Santos remains in Lee County jail on a $750 bond on charges of driving under the influence.
How much drinking does it take for someone to get to a .260% blood alcohol concentration? According to the chart at the BAC Rankings, assuming the 6'1" Ms. Santos weighs about 160 to 170 lbs, it would mean that she would have to have consumed 11 to 12 drinks (each equal to 1 ounce of 100-proof liquor, one five ounce glass of table wine or one 12-ounce bottle of regular beer) in the hour before she was arrested. Not the entire evening, the last hour before being tested.
(Naples News)

Male Dance Instructor Allegedly Gives "Performance" Clad in Women's Underwear at JC Penney - Ryan Kinsella Alba

Is it art if no one sees it? Is it a dance recital if the only member of the audience is a stunned clerk at JC Penneys? That's the question the district attorney in Milwaukee is asking after several women have complained about Irish dance instructor Ryan Kinsella Alba. And now it appears that it happened not once, but three times over the past four years. Here's more from WISN:

Alba, 24, is best known for his footwork -- he's an accomplished Irish dancer, and often performs with the students he teaches at his Kinsella Academy of Irish Dance.
But earlier this month, Alba made headlines after his encounter with a sales clerk at the Southridge JC Penny store. "He asked me very quietly, do you carry women's thongs," said Michelle Hernandez, a JC Penny clerk. Hernandez, 18, said Alba exposed himself to her in August as he tried on women's thong underwear in the men's dressing room.
"He began jumping up and down to see if it would fit better, he turned around and was looking in the mirror at his butt and said well how do you think it fits?" said Hernandez. "He also asked me if I could adjust his genital part."
Greendale police arrested Alba on a charge of lewd and lascivious behavior and he paid a $1,300 fine for the reduced charge of disorderly conduct.
Sources told 12 News Hernandez's story had a familiar ring for two other sales clerks.
A sales clerk at Southridge's Boston Store described a similar encounter to police but said Alba was trying on women's swimsuits.
The woman told police Alba's conduct so shook her, she even remembered the date -- Nov. 19, 2004.
Her allegations, however, came one week too late for criminal prosecution because in Wisconsin, the legal time limit for charging misdemeanors in Wisconsin is three years.
WISN 12 News has also learned that Monday, a second JC Penny clerk told the district attorney Alba did the same thing to her last March. She declined to talk on camera, but told 12 News when Alba emerged from the dressing room wearing a see-through leopard thong, she called her manager -- but no one ever called police.

Teacher/Cheerleading Coach Pleads Guilty to Sex With Boy, 17, Only Gets One Year in Prison - Kelli Jo Camp

Here's an update to a story we ran back in June: Former substitute teacher and cheerleading coach Kelli Jo Camp, 29, will get a year in jail and five years probation after pleading no contest to having unlawful sexual intercourse with a 17-year-old male student at New Cuyama High School. As we reported back then, Camp made it easy for the Santa Barbara Sheriff’s Department when they investigated and found Camp had received greeting cards from the alleged victim, in which he expressed his love for her. Cops also found photos of the victim in Camp’s desk drawer, and discovered allegedly incriminating e-mails between the two lovers where the boy talked about a consensual sexual relationship between them. At right, Kelli Jo Camp's mug shot.
Really, really do not want this one.

Female Teacher, 54, Arrested for Sitting Next to 14-Year-Old Boy at Football Game

Sitting in the stands of a high school football game is NOT illegal in most states unless, of course, you have already been arrested for allegedly having sex with an underage boy and ordered to stay away from the lad.
Charlene Schmitz, 54, used to teach at Leroy High School in Alabama until she was charged with second-degree rape and second-degree sodomy with a 14-year-old boy back in June. Since then, Schmitz has been on paid administrative leave while the cops take their time investigating. The only stipulation of her bail was that she stay away from the alleged victim, which she did until last Friday night when she decided to sit next to the boy at football game. For violating the judges orders Schmitz was promptly re-arrested.
Still do not want.

Drunk Dad Lets Drunk Son, 13, Drive for Him - Clio, Michigan

Drunk driving is never a good idea, so getting someone else to drive you home is a good option. An underage child? Not such a good idea. A DRUNK underage child? That's a Double Dumbass move if we've ever seen one. Here's more from UPI:

A Michigan man who allowed his 13-year-old son to drive because he had had too much to drink faces charges that include child endangerment.
Police in Clio say the boy had also been drinking and told his father he did not think he should get behind the wheel.
Both father and son were arrested last week after a police officer on routine patrol found their pickup truck stuck in the mud in a city park, the Flint Journal reported. The boy apparently turned into the park because he wanted to turn around and went off the road.
The son has been charged as a juvenile with driving while intoxicated. The father is also charged with allowing both an intoxicated person and an unlicensed minor to drive.

Hote Female Austin News Anchor Arrested for DUI - Michelle Valles, KXAN

Instead of reporting the news, one TV anchor in Texas is now making the news. Here's more from radio station KLBJ:

According to court records, an Austin Police officer started following an SUV driven by KXAN co-anchor Michelle Valles at 3rd and Lavaca after midnight this morning.
The officer says Valles swerved across a double yellow line on West Cesar Chavez Street into the on-coming lane of traffic and was allegedly driving about 12 miles an hour faster than the posted 35 MPH speed limit.
Valles allegedly admits to the officer that she had two vodka tonics, but reportedly refused to take a breathalyzer test. She was released on bail early this morning.

Mug shot at right, for better pics of this Latina beauty, check out her MySpace page here.
(Michelle Vallez)

Engaged! Female Teacher's Aide, 39, Tries to Marry Student, 16, Following Alleged Affair - Brenda Baillargeon, Amery High School

How wonderful! Weddings are always fun, even when there's a 23 year age difference between the bride and groom . . . and the young man is technically underage. But still! At least Brenda Baillargeon a teacher's aide at Amery High School in Wisconsin tried to do the right thing after authorities found out that she allegedly had been having sex since last May with a male student at her school. That's her mug shot at right . . . and just look at that sweet face! What teen aged boy wouldn't fall in love at first site with that?
On the other hand, it might be sad if he was thinking, at age 14, that "This is probably the best I can do, so I might as well take it."
Here's more from KSTP:

39-year-old Brenda Baillargeon allegedly had an inappropriate relationship with a 16-year-old student, in which they were planning to get married.
After the mother of the student was granted a restraining order to keep Baillargeon away from her son, Baillargeon still had phone conversations with the boy, according to the criminal complaint.
Baillargeon and the student were able to keep in contact by text messaging each other through Baillargeon’s daughter’s cell phone.
Baillargeon faces three counts of sexual assault by school staff. She also is being charged with child enticement and violating an injunction.

Thanks to reader Jamie B. for the link!
For a complete list of all of the Teacher Sex Scandals for 2007, click here.

White Plains, NY Dentist Involved in Parking Rage - Dr. William Moody

We've read of road rage . . . but parking rage? How tough is it to find parking spaces in White Plains, NY that Dr. William Moody, had to resort of fisticuffs to get to one.

Here's more from WCBS-TV - link includes edited and unedited footage. (Includes creepy footage of a really, really old Dr. Joyce Brothers):

The CBS 2 HD Westchester crew was about to head out on a story Friday when the news found them. Just outside our bureau Dr. William Moody, a White Plains dentist, left his Mercedes to confront Luis Infante for blocking his access to a parking lot. Moody even forced his way into Infante's car as if to move it himself.
Not long after, fists -- and bodies -- started flying.
"He was saying bad words to me, then he spit in my face," Infante said "Twice."
Then Dr. Moody spotted CBS 2 HD photographer Chris Calarco. Reporter Tony Aiello warned Moody not to touch the camera, but to no avail.
Police were called to the scene after Moody smacked the camera twice. While they arrived, Moody confronted the driver's sister, pushing her to the ground.
Yolanda Infante is okay, but considering this incident came so soon after her father's death just Thursday night, she is shaken.
"I'm devastated," Yolanda Infante said. "Besides my father's death, this happened in this moment."
Renowned psychologist Dr. Joyce Brothers said this kind of anger may have been sparked by personal issues.
"Whatever is going on in his life, he's not succeeding in. This is his way of just getting the stress out of his system," Brothers said. "I wouldn't like to be a patient of his!"

Man Arrested for DUI Three Times in 24 Hours

Australians seem to know how to catch drunk drivers. It appeared to be a bit harder to keep a 46-year-old Boddington from getting back on the road after being caught allegedly drink driving three times in a single day. For his first arrest, he blew a 0.194, almost four times the legal limit. He was then caught an hour later driving along the same road and the cops took his car away. Not to be one to let the law win, police say the man broke into the Boddington Police Station in the early hours of Sunday morning, retrieved his car, and drove away. He was arrested a third time later that morning and charged with drink driving, trespass and driving without a license.