Man Arrested for Assaulting Girlfriend With McDonald's Cheeseburger: No Word on Damaged Fries, Coke

We're pretty sure it wasn't part of any Happy Meal. According to police, Vincent Gonzalez, 22, of Vero Beach, Florida wasted a perfectly good cheeseburger this week during an argument with his girlfriend. Gonzalez and the unidentified woman were reportedly fighting in a car when he would not let her leave. At that point she threw Gonzalez's drink out of the car (likely a large Coke with no ice), and he grabber her arm and forced the cheeseburger into her face, according to the police report. Their discussion of proper fast food eating techniques was apparently over, as both of them stepped out of the car and Gonzalez once again smashed the cheeseburger into the woman's face.
Gonzalez has been charged battery domestic violence and unlawful destruction of a delicious 100% all beef patty smothered in glorious cheese on a toasted bun. (Okay, we made that last part up, but it should be a crime, right?) At right, the alleged weapon, being held in the Vero Beach jail fridge for later questioning . . . or eating. (TCPalm.com)