Couple Caught Having Sex in Police Station Parking Lot

To misquote Dean Wormer from Animal House, "Fat, drunk and naked in a police station parking lot is no way to go through life, son!" Here's more from the UPI:

Police in Hellertown, Pa., said a couple caught having sex in the police station parking lot told officers they did not realize where they had parked. Officers said the driver, Dennis Conor Cullen, was charged with drunken driving but neither he nor his female passenger, who was not named, were charged with anything related to their parking lot love making, The (Allentown, Pa.) Morning Call reported Thursday. Police said Cullen, 23, and the woman admitted to drinking earlier in the evening at a Lehigh University function but Cullen refused to submit a blood sample.

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School Resource Officer, 42, Fired for Pulling Girl, 13, Out of Class, Declaring His Love for Her

Apparently this school has run out of teachers for the students to have relationships with, so now their turning to the inhouse cops, er, "resource officers." In this case we have a 42-year-old former teacher, turned school cop, who admitted that he pulled a 13-year-old girl out of class, took her to an office and told her that he loved her. Of course, being a normal teenager, she promptly freaked out and told a guidance counselor who told the principal. Here's more from TampaBay.com:

Christopher Magavero, 42, a Pasco sheriff's deputy since 2000, admitted making the statement, said Sheriff's Office spokesman Doug Tobin. Sheriff Bob White then fired him, citing conduct unbecoming an officer.

Magavero, who has been at River Ridge Middle since late 2004, pulled the girl out of class Wednesday and took her to an administrative assistant's office, where they were alone, Tobin said. Sitting across a desk from her, he told the girl his feelings.

The Sheriff's Office is conducting a criminal investigation to make sure nothing physical occurred between Magavero and the girl.

"We have no evidence that anything physical took place, no evidence that a crime occurred at this point," Tobin said. "But the deputy certainly committed an incredible error in judgment."

Babysitter Arrested After Toddler Shoots 8-Year-Old

That headline pretty much says it all, doesn't it? Don't let strangers watch your kids . . . especially strangers who either own handguns or just leave them lying around where a 2-year-old can get a hold of them. Why shoot an 8-year-old? Why not? Who would you like to have shot when you were two if you got your hands on a gun? Think about it!
The details are sketchy on the story (the toddler refuses to talk until his mob lawyer can cut a deal with the DA) but needless to say, you're not likely to find another headline like this.

Until at least next week. Hey, this is Florida, we're surpised this doesn't happen every day! At right, the mug shot of the arrested babysitter, Trevaris Brown.

Here's more from the Miami Herald:

Trevaris Brown, 18, charged with child neglect, is free on $7,500 bond. According to police, Brown told Miami Detective Fernando Bosch that he was baby sitting a group of children ranging from 1 to 10 years old Saturday night at 5930 NW First Ave. He admitted ``he left the children home alone and went to the store.'' While away, a 2-year-old got a hold of a gun and shot the girl. She is expected to make a full recovery, police said. It was unclear who the gun belonged to.

Texas HS Squad Causes Stir After Mock Execution During Pep Rally

How Well Armed Do You Like Your HS Cheerleaders? - Like most schools across the country, Nacogdoches High is both Drug Free and Gun Free as a sign outside the building proudly boasts . . . unless, of course, you're a cheerleader then those kinds of "little details" get thrown out the window. Take, for instance, a recent pep rally at NHS and a skit designed to fire up the fans put on by the cheerleaders. The premise was simple enough (and oft repeated at HS pep rallies across the USA): the school mascot is kidnapped by students of the rival school (played by your JV cheerleaders, of course) and held of ransom. Your varsity cheerleaders ride in to the rescue and free the mascot, assuring that your team will march to victory at Friday night's big game. Oh, we forgot to mention: after freeing the mascot you then force the "kidnappers" to kneel in front of you, pull out your guns and shoot them in the head. After their deaths you throw money into the air (WTF?) and put their corpses in a pile so you dance on their graves! (Tony Soprano would be so proud! Go Fighting Mobsters!) 

We think it may be that last little part that is causing the stir at Nacogdoches HS, although so far no one has been suspended and the administration does not seem to be overly concerned about its young ladies performing mob hits on their rivals. According to NHS principal Nathan "Deadeye" Chaddick, " . . . this was just a simple skit done by our cheerleaders just to promote some school spirit and motivate the football team at a pep rally ... they were doing like a little country, cowboy-type skit." He goes on to compare this friendly teen sports carnage to classic theatre adding, "What do they want us to do with Shakespeare when kids have swords stabbing each other or plays with some shooting? It's the same thing. It's the same little skit. But because these three girls have a personal thing going on against some cheerleaders, they feel they have a right to use this venue for their personal agenda or purpose, and I'm just not going to allow that." The "they" Chadwick is referring to are two students who wrote an editorial in the school newspaper titled "Fearleaders" that was--surprise!--critical of the skit. Chaddick, of course, got to edit the copy and eliminated three whole paragraphs that just happened questioned the administration's support for the skit. (An unedited version of the editorial is supposed to be posted to the Daily Sentinel on Sunday, but their Opinion page is currently on loading correctly. If it did, you might be able to read it here.) 
Now, we don't think these cheerleaders should be kicked out of school or nothin', but we do have to question the decision-making skills of old Deadeye and anyone else at NHS who may have approved this skit beforehand or is not the least bit concerned about it now. (Daily Sentinel) 

Male Teacher Caught Leering at Schoolgirls While Using Homemade Electrical Sex Toy in Car

Yes, you read that headline correct. Who ever said that all those "shop classes" wouldn't pay off some day, eh?
The good news? It didn't happen in the United States, although this might, uh, "inspire" some of our fine male teachers here to take up the challenge and invent their own homemade electrical sex toys. That's the kind of "can do" spirit this country is known for.
Let's see if we have the details correct: Guy Milford has taught in Clydebank area schools (Scotland) for more than 10 years. Police found him in his car near Clydebank High as hew watched (they use the term leered) as students walked into school. So far, he's just annoying. Then police say they also found a “bizarre” electrical sex toy plugged into his car’s cigarette lighter. And to top things off Milford had his pants down around his hips and his hands on his lap and, okay, I don't need to draw you a picture, do I?
Here's more from the Clydebank Post:

Married dad, Guy Milford — who had worked in schools in the area for 10 years — had the “bizarre” electrical sex toy plugged into his car’s cigarette lighter as he watched pupils going into Clydebank High.

The weirdo 34-year-old was due to be working at Clydemuir Primary, in Dalmuir, on the day of the sickening incident. Cops rumbled Milford near the high school gates at around 8.30am as pupils arrived for classes. Milford later told Dumbarton Sheriff Court he was on his way to work, but the high school is more than a mile away from Clydemuir and he would have had to have taken a significant detour to be there.

Cops were stunned when they discovered the vibrating device on the teacher’s lap as he sat in his clapped out Volkswagon Polo. WPC Alana Innes, 24, a police officer for four years, told Dumbarton Sheriff Court on Friday: “I had never dealt with anything like this before and I was quite shocked. I could not believe it had happened right next to a high school.”
Arresting officer PC Christopher Holmes said: “The car was [initially] directly across the road from the school gates, no more than twenty yards from the entrance.

"When I went to speak to him I could see he was nervous because he was shaking and there were beads of sweat on his forehead.

“He was in the driver’s seat with both hands on his lap, which was unusual, but more unusual was I could see lots of red and green wires poking through his hand and the device was attached to the cigarette lighter.

“His trousers had been pulled down around his hips.”

Milford admitted he had used the device earlier on his journey, whilst driving through the Clyde Tunnel, but insisted he had not been using it outside the school.

Say What? Teacher at School for the Deaf Accused of Having Sex With Boy, 15 - Julie Denno, American School for the Deaf

Now that's what some people might call a "hands on" education.
Up until recently, Julie Denno, 27, was a teacher at the American School for the Deaf in West Hartford, CT. That is, until the adminstration found evidence that she was engaging in a relationship that included "inappropriate physical contact" and sexually charged text messages with a 15-year-old boy over a period of several months. Of course, that lead to her dismissal and then the cops got involved. At right, the only photo of Julie Denno we could find. Yeah, we know it sucks. If you find a better one, let us know.
Here's more from the Bristol Press:

A former teacher at the American School for the Deaf in West Hartford was charged Friday morning with sexually assaulting a student in the woman's former North Pond Street home, police said.
Denno was arrested on a warrant and turned herself into authorities Friday morning, where she was initially held on $75,000 bail. Judge Bernard D. Gaffney lowered that amount to $5,000 later in the day.
Police said the assault happened over a two-month period in Denno's former home.
They were made aware of her behavior in February, when the boy's mother contacted police about Denno's alleged conduct, which took place between December 2007 and January 2008.
It also wasn't clear Friday how long Denno was employed at the school or what her daily responsibilities were, but an administrator there said Denno was suspended without pay and subsequently fired months ago as the investigation unfolded.
"When we became aware of the situation, we cooperated fully with authorities, and the teacher was suspended without pay and ultimately fired in a very timely fashion," said Marilyn Rettig, the school's director of institutional advancement.
Police spokesman Lt. Edward Spyros said officials have no indication that Denno engaged in similar behavior with other juveniles.

Teacher Accused of Assaulting 10-Year-Old Girl by Putting Bucket on Her Head?

Teachers are caught doing a lot of strange things these days to student, many of which have nothing to do with sleeping with them. Take, for example, the case of Ann Lavery, a fifth grade teacher at Richford Elementary school in Vermont. She, apparently, had a misbehaving student in her class so she did what most teachers would do: she put a plastic bucket on the students head, and then hit the top of it. Yes, I thought it was kind of strange myself, but then again I don't have my teaching certificate. Here's more from Fox 44:

Vermont State Police said a mother told them Ann Lavery injured her daughter twice. Lavery a Fifth grade teacher, is accused of grabbing a 10 year old girl by the back of the neck and hurting her. The girl's mother told police it happened because the girl was in an area of the school where she was not supposed to be.
Lavery is also said to have put a plastic bucket on the same students head, and then hit the top of it. The girl reportedly was injured and her glasses damaged. Lavery, 54 has been a teacher for 32 years. Police say there have been other complaints made about Lavery.
"She has had prior complaints, and she was dealt with through the school on that and we are also looking into one other complaint that we have on her," said Sgt. Roger Langevin of the Vermont State Police.

Man Fined for Driving Drunk on Motorized Cooler

Have you seen one of these things? Looks like a regular cooler, except for the massive wheels, engine and steering wheel. Not sure how much booze they actually hold, but apparently it was enough to get this guy wasted. Here's more from Fox 44:

A North Country man has been fined almost $400 for driving a motorized cooler while drunk. Leslie Marr of Whitehall pleaded guilty this week to driving while ability impaired, a non-criminal violation. Marr was arrested in May for being drunk while driving a "Cruzin Cooler," which has handlebars and a seat on top for the operator. Marr was arrested after police saw him swerving while riding the cooler on a sidewalk. He was fined $300 and directed to pay an $80 surcharge.

Third Grade Teacher Arrested for Sex With Underage Boy - Alyson Perri-Jarvis, Southern Oaks Elementary School

Wow, gotta love that mug shot, don't you? The picture at right is of Alyson Perri-Jarvis, a third grade teacher at Southern Oaks Elementary School in Florida, who is accused of having a sexual relationship with a teen aged boy, starting when he was 15. The good news? According to the school district, Perri-Jarvis will NOT--we repeat NOT--be paid while she is in jail. Relieved, aren't you? The name of the now 18-year-old victim has not been revealed, but we do hear from sources that he is having his vision checked. Here's more from TBO.com:

Detectives say Jarvis, a third-grade teacher at Southern Oaks Elementary School, met the teen through neighborhood and family connections in 2005, when he was 15 years old. The teen, now 18, and Jarvis started a sexual relationship in July 2006 until August of this year, detectives said.
The teen, whose name was not released by authorities, told detectives about the relationship between him and Jarvis on Friday, the sheriff's office said. Jarvis is not being paid while she is in jail, Pinellas County School District spokeswoman Andrea Zahn said. If Jarvis posts bail, she will be placed on paid leave while the district conducts its own investigation, Zahn said.

Female Teacher, 41, Accused of Having Sex With Two Students at Home and School - Ranee Sue Proper

This week's female teacher banging (allegedly) underage students at her school comes to us from little Holly, Michigan, just up the road a ways from Detroit and not too far away from the Dumbass Daily corporate offices. At right, the only picture we could find of Ranee Sue Proper, 41, who used to be the vocal music teacher at Holly High School . . . that is, until she was arrested this week on five counts of third-degree criminal sexual conduct for allegedly having sex with two students both in her home and at the school. Here's more from the Flint Journal:

After months of whispers in this small town about a teacher allegedly having sex with students in the high school, a former Holly High School vocal music teacher was arraigned Tuesday on felony sex charges.
A police investigation began after a parent brought the allegations to police in May. Proper, a teacher in the Holly School District for four years, resigned June 25.
"The theatre and music kids, a lot of them will be devastated by this," said drama teacher Joe Mishler, who worked with Proper. "The last part of the school year was tough on the kids. She was someone they trusted and believed in."

Drunk Woman Drives Through Fence at Tampa Airport, Ends Up on Runway

That must have been one hell of a party! How drunk do you have to be to not only drive TO the airport, but through a six foot tall fence and then onto the airport runaway. So much for the power of Homeland Security! Here's more from Tampa Bay Online:

Kathy Lee Wilcox of 6810 Maple Lane, Tampa, drove her 2000 Hyundai through a 6-foot fence at the entrance to Vandenberg Airport this afternoon, according to the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office.
According to a statement from the sheriff's office: Witnesses said she drove up to the airport's closed gate on Eureka Springs Road, stopped her car and then drove through the fence, which is marked "No Trespassing." The fence also has a large stop sign posted near it.
Wilcox then drove onto the runway. Airport authorities boxed her vehicle in on the runway and called the sheriff's office. Sheriff's office aviation and canine units are housed at Vandenberg Airport. Deputies arrested Wilcox, charging her with driving under the influence involving property damage.

Teacher Caught Moonlighting as Prostitute, School District Still Deciding What to Do!

That sounds pretty shocking until you find out this happened in New Zealand where prostitution has been legal since 2003, so this mother in her 30s with two children, was only working as a hooker to, uh, supplement her income, according to the district which will have to decide what happens next. Here's more from Stuff:

An Auckland primary school teacher moonlighting as a prostitute will have to wait for a decision on her future employment by her school's board of trustees. The new teacher, a mother in her 30s with two children, has been working as a prostitute to supplement her income, the Herald on Sunday reported.
The newspaper, which did not name the teacher or her school, said a parent told the teacher's principal, who was balancing a possible negative reaction from parents with the woman's right to work in a job that has been legal in New Zealand since 2003.
It has been referred to the school's board of trustees, which will meet in committee to debate whether to ignore the issue, discipline the teacher or ask the Teachers' Council to decide. The woman reportedly told the principal that her action in her own time was not his concern, and that it was not affecting her ability as a teacher.
Teachers Council director Peter Lind said the most important factor was whether the teacher's second job was affecting her teaching duties, "and there would have to be actual evidence".

12-Year-Old Accused of Selling Pot at School to Classmates

Who says kids these days don't have any ambition? How many of you--at the age of 12--decided to go into business for yourself and try and sell a high demand product in a competitive marketplace? Not many, I would argue, which is why some people are impressed with a pre-teen at Churchill Junior High School in Galesburg, IL who was arrested this week for trying to sell marijuana to his classmates on school grounds. here's more from WQAD:

"Because of the age of the student we can't discuss what things will occur but we take a strong stance against any drugs or alcohol at school" said Principal Bart Arthur. Galesburg police say another student told teachers the 12-year-old had marijuana on him.
When taken to the principals office, the boy emptied his pockets, leaving teachers shocked to find four separate bags of pot and a lighter.
"We are very proud we had students willing to go forward and tell the teacher this was going on. At many schools kids are afraid to tell," Principal Arthur said. Principal Bart Arthur says the school takes extra steps to keep students drug free, conducting drug searches and providing anti-drug assemblies.
However, Arthur also understands this latest finding will leave some parents and grandparents feeling uneasy. "I don't like it. Think I'd go to jail myself when I'd go over and knock out of their hand and get rid of all of it" said Ron Graves whose granddaughter goes to Churchill school. The 12-year-old has now been charged with delivery and possession of four grams of marijuana.

Female Teacher Accused of Sending Naked Pictures of Herself & Having Sex With Boy, 13 - Stephanie Diane Harris, Marble City Schools

Who needs Playboy Magazine when you have good-looking teachers sending you naked pictures of themselves? No wonder readership is down!
In our latest "Female Teacher Sex Scandal" of 2008, Stephanie Diane Harris, who taught at Marble City Schools, has been arrested for having sexual relations with a minor, but also several text messages of nude photos of herself. What kind of pictures? According to one source, the pics consisted of Harris’ vaginal area, her nude breasts, and one of her breasts while wearing a bra or bathing suit top. Sounds like quite a collection for such a young lad?
A relieved school district attorney (as they do in most of these cases) was quick to boast that the alleged sexual encounters DID NOT take place on school grounds and happened during the month of June during the normal summer break. So, uh, don't sue us, please. At right, a picture of Stephanie Diane Harris.
Here's more from KFSM:

A former teacher at Marble City Schools has surrendered herself to the Sequoyah County Sheriff's Department after a warrant was issued on allegations of her having sexual relations with a minor.
Stephanie Harris, 27, allegedly had intercourse with a 13-year-old student. A court affidavit says after that incident, Harris sent the victim several text messages of nude photos of herself. Harris now faces four felony charges including first degree rape.

Mom, 33, Steals Daughter's Identity to Become High School Cheerleader - Wendy Brown, Ashwaubenon High School - Green Bay

Yikes! There might be a few younger looking gals out there who, at 33, might be able to convince someone they were college students or maybe a senior in high school, but this woman? How blind are the people at Ashwaubenon High School in Green Bay, Wisconsin? You're looking at one Wendy Brown, 33, who allegedly stole the identity of her own 15-year-old daughter, who actually lives in Nevada with Brown's mother. The senior Ms. Brown not only managed to get enrolled in school, she also made it on the cheerleading squad. Here's more from New York Daily News:

"The defendant stated she wanted to get her high school degree and be a cheerleader because she had no childhood and was trying to regain a part of her life she missed," according to the complaint.
She allegedly attended cheerleading practices before school started, received a cheerleader's locker and went to a pool party at the cheerleading coach's house.
A high school employee, Kim Demeny, told authorities that the woman, posing at the teen, seemed very timid, told her she was not good in math and even cried when she talked about moving from Pahrump Valley High School in Pahrump, Nev. Although she looked older than a student, Demeny said she believed her demeanor was consistent with that of a high school girl.
Assistant Principal Dirk Ribbins later learned Brown's daughter was enrolled at Pahrump Valley High School. Ribbins also spoke with Brown's mother who told him she had custody of the girl. She also said Brown has a history of identity theft crimes, the complaint said.
The complaint also said the $134.50 check Brown gave to the cheerleading coach for her uniform bounced. If convicted, she could face up to six years in prison and a $10,000 fine.