To be fair, Chalie Simon, 19, a coed at the University of Colorado had good reason to be upset with her, uh, "boyfriend," Job "Ow My Balls" Donkor. Apparently Simon expected Donkor to show up at her apartment in the middle of the night (she left the key under the mat) probably for some late night video game action. Instead, Simon showed up at Donkor's door at 3 o'clock in the morning . . . while he had another girl in his bed. Uh, oh.
After a heated exchanged, Simon alleged grabbed Donkor by the testicles and squeezed really hard before leaving. That's when the cops showed up and--most likely--started laughing. At right, Chalie Simon's mug shot picture. Click here for the full police report, brought to you by our friends at TheSmokingGun.com. (Thanks to Brian D. for the link!)
Isn't there anyone at UC that can show this young lady a good time without breaking her heart? Or maybe she's already crossed the Vicki Mendoza Diagonal? See the video below if you don't know what that is.
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