Married Michigan Mayor Caught Having Sex on Sidewalk With Another Woman

A Republican Commissioner and Novi, Michigan Mayor pro tem Kim Capello claims it was all innocent and that he was just walking a woman home from a bar . . . at 2 am . . . when things got a little frisky. In itself, not problem if you can find a room. Pretty soon though, cops responded to a report of indecent exposure and eventually found an unclothed man (allegedly Capello) and woman--not his wife--having what passed for drunken sex against a wall. When confronted by officers, the couple admitted they had been drinking . . . which might explain the public sex.

In addition to his public service, Capello is also a practicing attorney and shares an office (or maybe "shared an office") with his wife of 21 years. Capello was arraigned on an indecent exposure charge, which could result in 93 days in jail.

Police: Official, Woman Had Sex On Walk [Click on Detroit]

Thanks to reader mecaswell for the link!

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Mom Calls Cops When 12-Year-Old Won't Do Chores

Not a lot to this story, just a couple of lines from the police blotter in the Sun News:

DISPUTE: A mother phoned police because she was having trouble getting her 12-year-old son to do his chores. The two got into an argument and that's when she phoned police. She said she didn't know how to handle the situation. Police gave her options for obtaining assistance with family problems.

I saw this at the very bottom of a long list of other stupid police calls (including a rock thrown through the window of a house by a child who used to live in the how who was pissed about having to move) and it made me thing: What kind of mom calls the cops when her kid won't do his chores? Maybe if he had refused to do the chores and punched her in the face, maybe, but just because he wouldn't do them? Sounds more like a call to Dr. Laura or Dr. Phil, but the cops? The best part is the cops didn't laugh this off but instead gave her information about getting some help elsewhere. Gotta give the police some props for that.

If you have any suggestions for getting your kids to do their chores (other than calling for police back-up) please post them in the comments below.

Breaking News and More [Sun News]

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Female Teacher, 27, Accused of Relationship With Boy, 14

Blah, blah, blah. Anyone who's been to this site before knows the routine. Married female teacher with two small kids gives our her cell phone number to an underage boy. He texts her, she texts him and then things get naughtier. Naughty MySpace messages ensure and then they meet up at school. But that's where this story swerves from the usual: instead of heading to her house or his parent's basement, this duo--allegedly--went to a janitor's closet at school and started making out. (How romantic! Watch out for the bucket of vomit covering sawdust, honey!) According to cops, that's exactly what teacher Stephanie Jo Walters, who formerly taught at Musselman Middle School , is accused of doing.

The police report says the "victim" told them that Walters allegedly approached him during lunch and they went to a janitor’s closet where they kissed and she allowed him to touch her breasts, but not beneath her shirt. (Thank God!) Not surprisingly, Walters has been placed on administrative leave by the county school district. At right, Stephanie Jo Walters mug shot picture. (Thanks to reader Sandy S. for the link! If you come across a great dumbass story, email us at dumbassdaily at gmail.com!)

Teacher accused of relationship with student, 14 [Herald-Mail]

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Woman Arrested for DUI With Baby on Board

She probably would have gotten away with it, except for the fact that when she got out of the car at the CVS pharmacy, beer cans fell out of the car. The good news? The kid wasn't hers, just a relative.

The Hennepin County Attorney’s Office charged Leana Luvean Riddley, 49, of second-degree refusal to submit to chemical testing and third-degree driving while under in the influence for the May 1 incident. According to the criminal complaint, witnesses say they saw Riddley get out of her car at a CVS Pharmacy at 3655 Central Ave. NE. with a baby. As she opened the door, beer cans fell out and police were notified.

Police say Riddley admitted to drinking and driving. The child, who is Riddley’s niece, was unharmed.

Mpls. woman faces charges for driving drunk with baby [KSTP-TV]

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Prom Night Drunk Driver is Actually Limo Driver

Hey kids! Here's a tip from your Uncle Bob: if you insist on drinking when you go to your high school prom (and we don't recommend that you do) at least have the brains to hire a limo driver so you won't get . . . wait a minute, you DID hire a limo driver and now HE'S been arrested for DUI? The only option you have at that point is to have your parents drive you.

Good luck getting to third base with mom in the front seat!

A limousine company has fired the driver who was arrested Friday night in Lowell for allegedly drunk driving while ferrying local high school students around on their prom night. Lynette's Limousine Company said yesterday it had dismissed Brian Harrison, 45, of Tewksbury, who had worked for the company for three years, and had no previous problems.

The company said it is deeply shocked, troubled, and embarrassed by the exercise of poor judgment by Harrison. He was arrested after one of seven students from Lowell Catholic High School called her parents to report that Harrison seemed intoxicated when he came to pick them up at a movie theater Friday evening.

The students’ parents took them home.

Limo driver fired after alleged drunken driving incident [Boston Globe]

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Couple Arrested for Having Sex on Queen Elizabeth's Lawn

Okay, so maybe you don't have all the perks of the British Royal Family, but at least you don't have drunks having sex on your lawn . . . or do you? Here's more from WFIE:

A man and woman have a lot of explaining to do after being arrested Sunday afternoon outside Britain's Windsor castle. It wasn't for trying to breach security but for being a bit too playful.

Queen Elizabeth II was at the castle, the sentries were on duty, and the large park surrounding the magnificent building was full of tourists. So it didn't take long for people to realize that something was quite unusual.

Witnesses said an inebriated couple arrived from a nearby restaurant and began having sex on a grass bank outside the castle. One witness told the Sun newspaper they didn't care who was looking and "just kept going as if they were in their own bedroom." Japanese tourists even filmed the couple.

Police said the two were arrested and given a written warning about outraging public decency.

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