Drunk Driver Tries to Swim Away From Cops, Fails

Nobody every said you had to be smart to drive drunk, but most people don't try to make a run for it . . . or swim or it . . . to avoid arrest. I like the fact that the cops didn't have their own boat to go after this guy and had to borrow someone else's to nab this drunk driver.

Police in Benzie County say after driving drunk, a man tried to swim away from them. Just after 8:30 last night, an officer tried to pull the man over on M-22 near Maple Street in Frankfort, but he just kept going. After about five miles, police say the driver abandoned his car and ran into Crystal Lake, where he started swimming into deep water. Police borrowed a neighbor's boat and went after him.

9&10 News: Frankfort Police: Drunk Driver Tries to Swim Away

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Man Arrested for DUI After Beer Run on Riding Lawnmower

So, you lose your driver's license and really need some more beer and lottery tickets, but the closest store is too far to walk (or maybe stagger). So what do you do? Hop on your 2007 Cub Cadet riding lawnmower, that's what! Espcially if you are Dennis D. Cretton, 49, of Belleville, IL.

When deputies Jason Robertson and Lee Graham, and Investigator Scott Toth arrived, Cretton was returning home from the Conoco gas station about half a mile away on Centerville Avenue and had made it to the corner of Dianne and Fenwood drives, close to home, police said. They turned on their lights and tried to pull Cretton over, but he kept going, police said, veering off the roadway and heading into his front yard.

When he veered, however, a 12-pack of Milwaukee's Best Ice tumbled from his mower, Chief Investigator Capt. Steve Johnson said. Toth asked Cretton what he was doing, and Cretton admitted driving the lawnmower to the gas station for lottery tickets and beer, Johnson said.

Lawnmower driver on beer run charged with DUI; tried to pass cars on his Cub Cadet - From the online desk - Belleville News-Democrat

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Man Arrested for Barking at Michigan Police Dog

Woof! Not sure who's the bigger dumbass here: this dude for tormenting a police dog or the cops for arresting him without tasering him first?

Authorities said a man has been arrested in for barking at a police dog. The Three Rivers Police Department said officers responded Monday evening to an apartment complex to investigate a suspicious situation. Police said Wednesday in a statement a 26-year-old man in the area "began to torment" a police dog inside the patrol car by barking and shouting at it, causing the animal to become excited and "very aggressive." The man was arrested and later released on bond. He faces a charge of disorderly conduct

The Associated Press: Man arrested for barking at Michigan police dog

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Drunk Mom Maces Daughters Who Wouldn't Let Her Drive

Kids these days! They won't let you have ANY fun. So sometimes you have no choice but to mace them, right?

Pepper spray is intended for warding off attackers -- but this mom apparently pepper sprayed her own daughters. According to Tempe Police, 35-year-old Michelle Antone was trying to get the keys to her car Saturday night -- but she'd had too much to drink. When her adolescent daughters wouldn't help her, police say she lost her temper.

The woman's 10-year-old and 15-year-old daughters told police she'd been drinking, says Tempe Police Sgt. Steve Carbajal. "She starts asking them to the keys to her car. But the keys are in a separate room that's locked to prevent her drinking and driving," says Sgt. Carbajal. But the girls refused to give their mother the car keys. "At that point mom gets so mad she uses her pepper spray and sprays her 10 and 15-year-old daughters." The girls called 911.

Mom Allegedly Pepper Sprays Kids

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Bar Owner Allegedly Pulls Gun on Girl, 11, and Takes Skateboard

Dude! That is so harsh! Just chill, man, and little the girl skateboard, ya know?

A bar owner took an 11-year-old girl's skateboard at gunpoint and was charged with armed robbery, police said. Jack Connerton, 50, was angry over children cutting through his parking lot on skateboards, according to authorities. He was arrested on the felony count Saturday after he allegedly pointed a gun, took the girl's skateboard and snapped photos of four children, The Cincinnati Enquirer reported.

The girl's mother, Misty Bragg, said neighborhood children have to pass Connerton's Towerview Sports Pub in Cincinnati to get to a recreation center and park.

Bar Owner Arrested for Allegedly Taking Girl's Skateboard at Gunpoint - FOXNews.com

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Women Crazy Glue Casanova's Penis to His Stomach in Motel Room Ambush

Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned . . . unless you're talking about FOUR women scorned. Then you've got REAL problems, like this guy in Wisconsin who will likely not forget any time soon that he should have kept it in his pants, because now he's going to have trouble pulling it out again. Ouch!

A sticky case of revenge unfolded last week in a Wisconsin motel after a woman discovered her husband was cheating and invited three other scorned lovers to settle the score -- with Krazy Glue. The 36-year-old Lothario was carrying on with all of them before his wife figured it out and notified the others, according to a criminal complaint filed in Calumet County, Wis., in a town about 90 miles north of Milwaukee. "We had a plan," one of the women, Therese Ziemann, 48, told an investigator, according to court records.

Ziemann lured the man to a Stockbridge hotel Thursday, promising a "rub down," the complaint says. He was blindfolded and tied to a bed. Then Ziemann text-messaged the other three women, including the man's wife, who joined her in the room. One of them, Wendy Sewell, 44, reportedly asked, "Which one do you love more?" After the victim was threatened with mace, punched in the face and taunted, the mischief moved south. Ziemann glued a sensitive body part to his stomach, according to the complaint.

The women, including Michelle Belliveau, fled when the man started yelling. All were later charged with false imprisonment. Ziemann also faces charges of fourth-degree sexual assault and misdemeanor battery. The wife was not named to protect the man's identity.

Women stick together against cheating lover -- chicagotribune.com (Link inlcudes mug shots of all the "ladies"

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Why Didn't I Think of That? Jobless Woman Sues College for $70K in Tuition

Are you a recent college grad? Still haven't found that dream job (or any job for that matter) yet? Don't just sit there, sue your old school and all that money you wasted on tuition back . . . like this lady in NYC.

Trina Thompson filed a lawsuit last week against Monroe College in Bronx Supreme Court. The 27-year-old is seeking the $70,000 she spent on tuition. Thompson says she's been unable to find gainful employment since she received her information technology degree in April. She says the Bronx school's Office of Career Advancement hasn't provided her with the leads and career advice it promises.

Monroe College spokesman Gary Axelbank says Thompson's lawsuit is completely without merit.

Jobless NYC woman sues college for $70K in tuition | Freep.com | Detroit Free Press

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