Sunday, October 04, 2009

Youth Counselor Helps 17-Year-Old Sex Offender Escape, Spends Night With Him

This story is so think with dumbassness, it's hard to read. Bottom line: someone better lose their job AND go to jail over this one.
Police knew just where to find the 17-year-old fugitive from a Baltimore County detention facility. All they had to do was trace a call he made on the cell phone of his lover - an employee at the center. The boy, a sex offender who had been in custody at a treatment facility in Parkville, fled Monday evening during a sanctioned group outing to a White Marsh movie theater.

As Maryland State Police officials told the story Thursday, the boy made his getaway by hopping into a waiting car driven by Tyra M. Greenfield, a 26-year-old youth counselor. The couple spent the night at her home on Surrey Lane in Nottingham, where they had sex, police said.

The next day, the boy used Greenfield's cell phone to call a relative in Laurel, Del., and she drove him there and dropped him off, police said. Detectives discovered Greenfield's involvement by tracing the call to her phone. The youth was picked up Wednesday morning at the relative's house by local law enforcement officers at the request of the Maryland State Police. He was taken to the Lower Eastern Shore Juvenile Center, and will be charged with escaping, police said.
Youth counselor helped lover, 17, flee Parkville detention facility -- baltimoresun.com

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Friday, October 02, 2009

Woman Finds Drunk, Passed Out US Capitol Cop in Her Bed

Unfortunately, she was hoping for some hot Chippendale's dancer, but this is what she got instead. Send him back for a full refund!
Arlington police say a U.S. Capitol Police officer was arrested when a woman came home to find the stranger passed out drunk in her bed. Police said the 34-year-old man was still sleeping when officers arrived at 1 a.m. Sunday. Spokeswoman Crystal Nosal said the officer was charged with unlawful entry. Police don't know why the officer, who lives in Reston, picked the woman's apartment to sleep, but investigators believe he came in through the front door.
Woman Finds U.S. Capitol Officer Passed Out In Her Bed - cbs2chicago.com

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Thursday, October 01, 2009

Your Mom's Dancing is Hot, But It's Creeping Me Out

This lady, who looks to be in pretty good shape--whatever her age is--has posted literally hundreds of videos of herself dancing and she's pretty darn good. She usually starts each one the same way, with a close-up of her neck and/or chest. She also dances TO the camera, like you would expect someone at a, well, a "gentleman's club" would do, if you were a client (or so we're told.) Both entertaining and a little creepy at the same time. Imagine though, if she was your mom and this went on every time your friends came over. Then again, maybe they would come over more, loser! Your comments below.

(Did a little more research and found out this lady's name is Diana Campanella and she's an artist of some sort. Website with bio here.)

Toddlers Abandon Drunk Mom Passed Out in Car

Somehow, this lady made it all the way home from . . . wherever, and then passed out in her driveway with her two kids in the back seat. Since they couldn't wake mom up, they decided to hoof it and started walking, ending up two miles away, about to cross the street. The kids' ages: 2 and 3!
Two toddlers were found wandering across a busy Broward county street and a short time later, police arrested their mom for DUI. According to police, Brenda Duclos was driving drunk with her two kids in the backseat Monday evening. When she pulled into the driveway of her Cooper City home, she passed out behind the wheel with the 2-year-old and 3-year-old still inside the car.  Police say, after several hours, the children got out of the car and started walking. They were found two miles from home trying to cross busy Palm Avenue.
SOURCE: BSO: Mom Of Wandering Kids Found Drunk In Her Car - cbs4.com

Male Teacher in Bronx Arrested After Student, 15, Gets Pregnant

Well, that's one way to be pretty sure that she's not making it up.
A Bronx teacher was busted Wednesday for having sex with a student - a 15-year-old girl who became pregnant, police sources and students said. Bill Agosto, 26, was arrested by the special victims squad in the Bronx and charged with thirddegree rape and sexual misconduct.

Sources said the relationship was consensual. "This wasn't a one-time thing," said a police source. "It was going on for up to a year."
Bronx teacher busted for sex with student after girl, 15, gets pregnant

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Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Female Teacher Actually Sentenced to Two Years in Jail for Sex With Boy - Jessica Lynne Kelley

So much for the double standard of teacher/student sex scandals . . . at least in Texas. A female teacher was finally given some actual jail time after she plead guilty to having sex with a 16-year-old boy. Wonder if they'll let her off early? Stay tuned.
A former Spring High School geography teacher was sentenced to two years in prison for having a sexual relationship with a male student who was 16 years old at the time. Jessica Lynne Kelley, 25, pleaded guilty Monday to improper relations with a student.  Prosecutors dropped two felony counts of sexual assault of a child in exchange for the plea. Court documents say Kelley and the boy had sex three times in July of 2008 at the teacher’s home.
Ex-Spring High School teacher pleads guilty in student sex case | LOCAL NEWS | KHOU.com | News for Houston, Texas

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Video: Miami TV Reporter Gets Owned on Live TV

This is all in Spanish, but according to the information with the video, the female reporter (in the really tiny black dress) asks this guy a stupid question and he does the only thing he can think of in response: he hugs her and wrestles her to the ground. Watch the slow motion version at the end to see that she has the presence of mind to try and pull her skirt down in back with one hand, even as she holds onto the mic with the other.


LiveLeak.com - Latina TV Reporter Gets Owned On Live TV

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Friday, September 25, 2009

Father and Son Both Arrested for Drunk Driving

The family that "plays" together, apparently goes to jail together as well.
A father who came to town to bail his son out of jail for a drunken driving arrest ended up there himself on the same charge. According to a release from the State Patrol, Trevor Brown, 19, of Gothenburg, was pulled over around 1:30 a.m. Sept. 19 by an NSP trooper for having a broken taillight. The trooper who made the stop determined that Brown was under the influence and arrested him for drunken driving and minor in possession of alcohol.

Brown was booked into the Dawson County jail in Lexington. There, he called his father, Anthony, 53, to come bail him out. When the elder Brown arrived at the jail around 3:30 a.m., the trooper observed that he was intoxicated as well.  The trooper warned Brown not to drive. However, 45 minutes later he observed the Browns exit the jail and enter a 2001 Dodge Ram. The elder Brown was behind the wheel when the trooper pulled the vehicle over.
North Platte Nebraska's favorite newspaper - The North Platte Bulletin

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Thursday, September 24, 2009

Man Arrested for Throwing 3000 Golf Balls Into Lake in National Park

It takes all kinds, doesn't it?
Joshua Tree National Park, in the California desert not far from Palm Springs, is known for its strange trees and bare rocks. But not golf.  That's why the discovery of nearly 3,000 golf balls on the alien landscape caused the National Park Service to cry something other than "Fore!", the Los Angeles Times tells us.

Seems the bevy of balls, tossed from a passing car, was just one golf lover's tribute to dead duffers.  But the park service is calling Douglas Jones, a 57-year-old golf course worker, a litterer.  Park spokesman Joe Zarki explains: "Sometime around 2007 our rangers began discovering large quantities of golf balls in some turnout areas of the park. We were wondering what was going on here. There were also some tennis balls involved.

"He said he did it because he wanted to honor all the golfers who had died."
Golfer accused of tossing 3,000 balls into Joshua Tree park - On Deadline - USATODAY.com

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Monday, September 21, 2009

Female Biology Teacher Pleads Guilty to Emailing Picture of Her Breasts to Boy, 17 - Jessica Percifull

Jessica Percifull used to teach biology at Northeast High School. That is until she allegedly learned how to use a cell phone camera to take a picture of her "upper body" and send it to a 17-year-old boy who was probably very surprised to get something like that.
A former Northeast High School teacher pleaded guilty to misdemeanor charges admitting she showed harmful materials to a student.  Jessica Percifull, who was a biology teacher in her second year of teaching at Northeast High when allegations of sexual exploitation arose, was set to go to trial this morning in Judge John H. Gasaway's court.

Art Bieber, assistant district attorney, said Percifull had taken a picture of her nude upper body and e-mailed it to a 17-year-old student. Following an investigation by Clarksville Police detectives, Percifull was charged with one count of sexual exploitation of a minor and indicted by the grand jury.  Instead of a trial, the case was dismissed and Percifull entered guilty pleas to two counts of exhibiting harmful material to a minor. Both charges are A misdemeanors.
theleafchronicle.com | The Leaf-Chronicle | Clarksville and Fort Campbell news, community, entertainment, yellow pages and classifieds. Serving Clarksville, TN

UK Dentist Strips Down to Leopard Thong to Seduce Dental Hygenist

On top of that he pranced around shouting "Get a load of that!"

Yeah, that'll get you in trouble with the law, even in the United Kingdom.

A dentist whipped off his trousers and paraded in front of his practice nurse wearing nothing but a leopard-print thong. Dr Anthony Barton, 36, who is married, pranced around in front of the 19-year-old nurse and shouted: 'Get a load of that!'

His less than subtle wooing tactics evidently paid off, because the couple began a passionate relationship involving sexual encounters in the surgery. But three other nurses were offended by his conduct towards them, and yesterday he was brought before the General Dental Council to answer charges of inappropriate behaviour.

The panel heard that the dentist regularly groped nurses' bottoms, twanged their knicker elastic and tried to undo their brassieres through their tunics.
Dentist who 'pranced around clinic in leopard-skin thong before seducing nurse' faces being struck off | Mail Online

Drunk Female Teacher Found in Parked Car w. Boy, 15 - Valerie Roesler

The new school year is less than a month old and already the female teacher/student sex crime stories are so far ahead of 08-09 that many principals are thinking of resigning early this year just to avoid the public embarrassment. This time we have middle school teacher Valerie Roesler, who was caught in a parked car in the middle of the night with a 15-year-old boy AND allegedly drunk at the time.  Wow! You don't see that kind of dedication to ruining one's career every day.

Our sources are telling us that Roesler, who taught at Hayfield Secondary School in Alexandria, Virginia was the school's driver's ed and sex ed teacher. Those same sources say that, due to recent cutbacks, the school had to combine the two classes and, allegedly hold it in a car in the middle of the night.  (BTW, We're starting not to trust some of our sources.)

Looking at Valerie Roesler's mug shot, don't you just want to yell "WAKE UP!"? And, either that's a cold sore over her upper lip or the lipstick got smeared somehow. Oh, yeah, never mind. Your comments on the lastest spat of student/teacher sex below. (Thanks to reader Rocco C. in Burk, VA for the tip on the story! Send your story tips to DumbassDaily at Gmail.com.)
A Fairfax County teacher is charged with contributing to the delinquency of a minor and public intoxication after she was found in a parked car with a 15-year-old boy in the middle of the night. Officers discovered 27-year-old Valerie Roesler, of Alexandria, parked in a 2008 Mitsubishi Lancer in the 7900 block of Gunston Hill Lane about 1:50 a.m. Sunday, police said.

Investigators believe the boy snuck out of his parents' home. He is not one of Roesler's students, police said. Investigators say Roesler met the boy earlier this year, but did not elaborate.
Teacher Found Drunk With Boy, 15, in Car|ABC 7 News


Sunday, September 20, 2009

Teacher Caught in Bushes Having Sex with Boy, 13 - Ashley Jo Beach

You'd think a 37-year old middle school math teacher would know better, but apparently not. Ashley Jo Beach continues our long line of middle-aged women who can't seem to get enough of the underage boys. Usually though, they can find at least a dark stretch of road and the back of a car.
Officers in Meridian, Idaho received a call at 9:30 p.m. Thursday concerning something suspicious happening in some bushes not far from the town middle school. That's when they found science and math teacher Ashley Jo Beach laying down with a 13-year-old student.

Their stories didn't quite match, and it is rather hard for a 37-year-old teacher to explain what she's doing in the bushes with a little kid. Now she's been charged with having an affair with the student since April.
True Crime Report - Idaho Teacher Ashley Jo Beach Caught in Bushes with 13-Year-Old

Friday, September 18, 2009

Teacher Allegedly Paid Teens in Booze, Drugs to Clean House

The best part of this story for me is the "Was that wrong of me?" mug shot picture. It's almost as if she never really gave any thought to the fact that allegedly giving weed and booze to some teenagers in exchange for a cleaning her home would not only cost her her job, but put her in jail as well.

How did this happen?
A teacher at a Fox Lake high school recruited two teenage girls to do chores around her home — then paid the 14-year-olds for their work with marijuana, alcohol and prescription Zoloft, Lake County authorities said today. Kym Krocza, 41, faces felony charges of contributing to the delinquency of a minor for allegedly providing the teens with the drugs and alcohol between January and August, officials said.

Since her Tuesday arrest, Krocza has been suspended from her job as a calculus and algebra teacher at Grant Community High in Fox Lake — the school the two teens began attending last month. Krocza teaches both the girls, authorities said. But Krocza allegedly knew the teens before they started attending the school because they live near her home in unincorporated Ingleside, Lake County Sheriff Mark Curran said.
Police: Fox Lake teacher paid students with drugs, alcohol :: CHICAGO SUN-TIMES :: Chicago Crime

Thursday, September 17, 2009

Driver With Suspended License Arrested for DUI on Lawnmower

You gotta get to the liquor store somehow, don't you? Damn! People act like when you drive drunk on a golf cart you're not using your brains.
Jeffrey S. Cookson, 39, of Killdeer Lane was charged with operating a vehicle while under the influence of intoxicants, operating after license suspension and operating beyond license restriction following the 9:20 p.m. incident. He was taken to the Waldo County Jail where he is being held for violating his probation.

Waldo County Chief Deputy Robert Keating said the department had received complaints Wednesday about a man driving a lawn mower around town. Keating said Deputy Dave Mushrall was on routine patrol on School Street a short time later when he observed a pair of headlights turn on from the side of the road in his lane of travel. Mushrall noticed the lights were smaller than those of a full-size car.

Mushrall reported that the vehicle crossed the street and drove in his direction. As it got closer, Mushrall realized it was a lawn mower heading his way. When the mower passed him, Mushrall turned his cruiser around and activated his blue lights. The mower driver immediately turned the mower into a driveway and stopped. When Mushrall approached Cookson, who was on the mower, he determined the man was intoxicated.
Unity man arrested for drunk driving on lawn mower - Bangor Daily News

Double Standard? Prosecutors Can't Explain Why Charged Dropped Against Pretty Blond HS Teacher Michele Taylor

A male coach at a school in the same Washington County was slapped with the most severe charges when he was accused of having sex with an underage girl. But shortly after claiming that a female teacher, Michele Taylor, would face similar charges for a similar complaint, prosecutors unexpectedly dropped the most serious of the charges against her . . . and have been unable or unwilling to explain their actions. You don't think there's a double standard when it comes to hot female teachers, do you?
An East Valley High School teacher has pleaded not guilty to sex charges involving a student; however, a charge of sexual misconduct has been mysteriously reduced from what prosecutors initially said they had filed. The attorney for Michele Taylor, 31, entered the written plea on her behalf to second-degree sexual misconduct, as well as to two counts of communicating with a minor for immoral purposes. The court filing requested a jury trial.

Last week, the deputy prosecutor handling the case told reporters he had charged Taylor with first-degree sexual misconduct -- a felony punishable by up to five years in prison. Earlier this week, deputy prosecutor Sam Chen said he didn't know why the charges filed in Yakima County Superior Court were actually for second-degree sexual misconduct -- a gross misdemeanor punishable by up to one year in prison.

Interviewed Monday, Chen reiterated that the charge was supposed to be in the first-degree and that he would look into the discrepancy. Since that time, however, both he and county Prosecutor Jim Hagarty have repeatedly failed to return messages left by phone,
e-mails and in person at their offices. A first-degree charge is an accusation of sexual intercourse with a minor; a second-degree charge merely means sexual contact.
No telling why teacher's sex charge reduced | Yakima Herald-Republic Online

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Fake Cop Pulls Over Real Mayor

There's been a spat of these "fake cops doing stupid things" stories lately. Not sure why. Maybe something with the economy? Who knows, but the more of them out there, the more likely they are to do something stupid like this guy.
Police in Louisiana said a man who attempted a traffic stop while impersonating an officer pulled over the mayor of his town. Investigators said Daniel Niederhelman, 21, used a red light mounted on his dashboard to pull over a car Monday, but got back into his Chevy Monte Carlo and drove away when he recognized the driver of the vehicle as Shreveport Mayor Cedric Glover, the Shreveport Times reported Tuesday.  Glover phoned the real police and followed the car through several neighborhoods until it stopped at a house. Officers arrested Niederhelman and he was charged with one count of false impersonation of a peace officer.
Police: Fake cop pulled over mayor - UPI.com

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Man Caught on Camera Stealing Surveillance Cameras

Are criminals getting dumber or does it just seem like it anymore? At right, genius at work.
A man accused of stealing security cameras forgot to turn them off before planning his scheme. Police say they were able to identify Dennis Lottig, 33, from surveillance video. Lottig allegedly stole four cameras from City National Bank in St. Albans overnight Sunday into Monday. Those cameras are valued at $1,900 each. All of the cameras have been recovered, but damages to them still have to be assessed.
SOURCE: Man Caught on Tape Stealing Surveillance Cameras

Would You Like a Gun With Your Happy Meal?

I remember when the Happy Meal toys were just Legos or mini-Barbie dolls. But a gun and some weed? Damn we never got anything that good. I'm not lovin' it.
A teen was given more than just chicken sandwiches at a McDonald's drive-through in Charleston, S.C. -- he also got a gun and some pot. WCSC-TV reports that along with two bags containing food, the teen said he was given a third bag containing a handgun and bags of pot at a McDonald's on Savannah Highway on Aug. 29.

"The gun and the marijuana was inside of a brown bag sitting inside of a McDonald's bag," said Kathy Rivera, the teen's mother. "And they noticed they had three bags, and there were only two people in the car, so when he opened it, he noticed it." Police said the bag with the gun and pot were meant for the car behind the teen at the drive-through. The people followed the teen to a gas station and demanded that the teen give them the bag.
SOURCE: Teen Gets Gun, Pot With McDonald's Meal

Monday, September 14, 2009

Kanye West Interrupts Barak Obama Speech

You knew this was going to happen eventually. Kanye West and President Obama would be in the same place at the same time and, well, we'll let the video tell the story about what happened.



YouTube - Kanye West Interrupts Barack Obama Speech

Prank Call About Shooting Results Statutory Rape Charge

Here's a tip for all you 18-year-old studs having sex with girls under 16. Don't use your cell phones during to try and impress the youngsters while you call the police to report an imaginary shooting. The cops don't care for that kind of shit and they'll track you down to her bedroom . . . and then they'll find some reason to arrest your ass. Take this Alabama genius:
An 18-year-old man who police say made a prank phone call about a shooting has been arrested for statutory rape. David Wayne McCarn II of Bay Minette was charged Friday with second-degree rape and rendering a false alarm. He was being held in the Baldwin County Corrections Center on $11,000 bail.

Sheriff Huey "Hoss" Mack said Baldwin 911 operators received a report that someone had been shot Thursday night. He said officers traced the call to a teenage girl's cell phone and found her still in bed and McCarn hiding in a closet. Under Alabama law, a man who is 16 or older who has sex with a girl younger than 16, but older than 12, can be charged with second-degree rape.
Police Arrest Man for Statutory Rape After He Prank Calls 911 - Local News | News Articles | National News | US News - FOXNews.com

Friday, September 11, 2009

Nine Women Rescued From Fake Reality Show - Like Big Brother

From our "Why Didn't I Think of That?" files? A group of nine Turkish women were rescued this week from a compound where they had been keep for two months thinking they were filming a reality TV show. Hah!
Nine young women tricked into joining a fake reality show and kept isolated for two months were rescued by the gendarmerie Tuesday. The women, some as young as 16, were kept confined in a villa in the Beykoz district of Istanbul and videos of them in the house were sold over the Internet.

According to reports, the organizers of the fake show placed advertisements in newspapers that called for “contestants to compete in a reality show akin to ‘Big Brother’ that will be broadcast on FX TV” and interviewed dozens of would-be contenders.

Nine were told they were chosen and made to sign a contract that stipulated that if any of the participants left before two months were up, they would have to pay a fine of 50,000 Turkish Liras. The young women were also told they would have no contact with the outside world, including their families, for the two-month period. Dreaming of becoming television stars, they accepted all the preconditions.
SOURCE: Girls rescued from fake 'Big Brother' - Hurriyet Daily News and Economic Review

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Video: Open Mic Catches California Congressman's Explicit Sex Talk

Although it is hard to hear at times, this conversation is definitely NOT safe for work . . . especially if you'd like to continue working for the people! Video below.
An Orange County lawmaker who inadvertently broadcast explicit remarks about his sexual conquests over an open microphone during a lull in a Sacramento hearing abruptly resigned from office this afternoon.  Assemblyman Mike Duvall (R-Yorba Linda) stepped down after legislative leaders stripped him of his committee posts this morning and launched an ethics probe of his actions.

"I am deeply saddened that my inappropriate comments have become a major distraction for my colleagues in the Assembly, who are working hard on the very serious problems facing our state," Duvall said in a written statement. "I have come to the conclusion that it would not be fair to my family, my constituents or to my friends on both sides of the aisle to remain in office. Therefore, I have decided to resign my office, effective immediately, so that the Assembly can get back to work."


SOURCE: LiveLeak.com - OPEN MIC CATCHES CONGRESSMANS EXPLICIT SEX TALK

Drunk Mom Arrested While Driving Kid to School, Stopped to Ask Cop for Directions

The dumbass is strong in this one, but it certainly appears that she can hold her liquor! A .29% BAC . . . first thing in the morning and she's still able to move? That's some drinkin' . . . but probably not a good idea to be drivin'.
Police in Ferndale arrested a mother on a charge of driving drunk after she asked an officer for directions to drop off her 9-year-old son at school.

Dena Ellington, 45, of Birmingham stopped her Land Rover in the parking lot of Taft Education Center at 8:40 a.m. Tuesday to ask for directions to Coolidge Intermediate School, according to Ferndale Police. A Breathalyzer test given after the officer smelled alcohol on her breath registered her blood-alcohol level at .29, more than triple Michigan’s legal limit of .08.

The officer took Ellington, who had no prior drunken driving convictions, to jail while another officer dropped her son off at school.
SOURCE: Police: Mom drove drunk to son's school | Detroit Free Press | Freep.com

Teacher Convicted of Student Sex Violates Parole by Hooking Up With Kid Again

We remember this story! The cops caught Margaret De Barraicua, 34, having sex in a car with a 16-year-old boy while her toddler was in the back seat. Sounds like they let her off with a slap on the wrist and all she had to do to stay out of jail was stay away from the victim. Oops.
A former McClatchy High School teacher convicted four years ago of having sex with a 16-year-old student was arrested again last month after authorities said she resumed a relationship with her victim. Margaret De Barraicua, 34, was arrested Aug. 28 and booked into the Sacramento County Main Jail for violating her parole in connection with the 2005 conviction, according to the Sacramento County Sheriff's Department Web site.

De Barraicua was arrested in 2005 when police said they found her having sex with a 16-year-old boy in her car behind Leonard Da Vinci Elementary School in Sacramento. Police said De Barraicua's 2-year-old son was in the backseat at the time. While police questioned her, she admitted to three other encounters with the boy.
SOURCE: Sacramento Teacher Convicted of Sex with Student Busted on Parole Violation | News10.net | Sacramento, California | News

Teacher Arrested After Student Overdoses in Her Home on . . . Marijuana?

Dude! Imagine the size of the bong you'd have to hit to OD on weed!

Actually, the article says they don't know what the kid overdosed on (too much fun, perhaps?) but either way, this is not going to earn Lori Anne Jarvis the Teacher of the Year Award . . . unless it's from the legalize pot crowd.
Jail officials say a Radford City Public School teacher is no longer being held behind bars after being arrested. New River Valley Jail authorities say 43-year-old Lori Anne Jarvis is out on bond. Police say a juvenile overdosed at her home. Jarvis is charged with possession of marijuana and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. Police said the juvenile was treated at a local hospital and later released. They haven't said what the student overdosed on.
SOURCE: Teacher Arrested Out on Bond|ABC 13

Dallas Cop Accused of Putting Cocaine in Drinks

Say what? Is that supposed to work like the date rape drug or something? Not sure where this cop thought he was going with this, but sounds like he'll end up in jail.
A reserve Dallas police officer was arrested early Wednesday on suspicion of sprinkling cocaine into drinks of two patrons at a bar, according to a police news release and police reports. The officer was identified as Brad Hellums, 46, who has worked for the department for six years. Hellums was arrested about 12:30 a.m. Wednesday in the 1900 block of Greenville Ave., the release states.
SOURCE: Dallas reserve police officer arrested in drug case | Dallas | Star-Telegram

Monday, September 07, 2009

Dumbass Drunk Driver Launches Car Into Second Story of House

A drunk driver got a little bit of assistance in making his car fly.
Like a scene out of the "Dukes of Hazzard," a driver launched his SUV from the road into the second-floor of a Long Island home early Saturday.

"All hell broke loose," said homeowner John Sarli, 58, who was sleeping at the far end of his E. Moriches house when the 2005 Jeep Grand Cherokee crashed through the front.

"I was kind of in shock."

Suffolk County cops said Adam Clark, 20, was driving drunk when he hit a dirt berm 20 feet off E. Moriches Blvd. about 12:20 a.m.

The Jeep flew 65 feet into the grand foyer of Sarli's two-story Victorian house.

Cops: Drunk driver goes flying, crashes into Long Island house's second floor

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