Teen, 14, Awakes to Find Fat Mom, 34, Having Sex on Couch With Friend, 15 - Teri Mezzatesta

So much fail in this story, so little time to tell it. But here are the basics:

The 14-year-old son of 34-year-old Teri Mezzatesta had a friend over back in November. The boys smoked pot with Ms. Mezzatesta for a couple of hours and then her son passed out in his bedroom, leaving mom and friend alone in the living room. According to cops, she then offered him some wine coolers and when those finally took effect, offered to perform oral sex on him. What's a 15-year-old boy to do? Next think you know the two are having sex on the couch when junior wakes up to see something he wishes he could un-see. He punches the friend, the kid leaves, but comes back because his cell phone is dead. The son loans him his phone for a few days (people really do that?) and got it back, only to find some sex-laced texts between his former friend and mom.


For her part, Ms. Mezzatesta claims she passed out that night, only to wake up with he friend's son on top of her. She awoke when the boys were fighting. Only problem with that story? She's 5'9" and weighs 260 lbs according to reports. Okay, so a drunk teenaged boy will mount anything, but her son claims he woke up when he heard her shouting sexual instructions on how to pleasure her to his friend.

Yeh. Double eww.

Mezzatesta faces a variety of charges including statutory sexual assault, a second-degree felony, and false swearing in official matters by falsely incriminating another.

Source: ABC Local